BDSMChat Blog
Online Kink Etiquette: Dos and Don'ts
Good manners make the kink community better for everyone. A little etiquette goes a long way toward respectful, enjoyable conversations. Here are the dos and don'ts of chatting online.
Do open with respect
A friendly, respectful hello beats a demand or an explicit opener every time. Treat the person on the other end as an equal, because they are.
Do not assume roles
Do not assume someone's role, gender, or interests. Ask, listen, and let them tell you. Assumptions are a fast way to make a poor first impression.
Do negotiate first
Before any roleplay, agree on what is welcome and set a stop signal. Diving in without checking is both rude and unsafe.
Do not push past a no
If someone declines something or sets a limit, respect it immediately. Pushing, guilting, or arguing is the clearest sign of a bad chat partner.
Do take skips in stride
Not every conversation clicks, and that is fine. If someone skips or is not interested, do not take it personally, just move on to the next person.
Do not share private details
Etiquette protects you too. Keep your own identifying information private, and never pressure others to reveal theirs. Discretion is part of good manners here.